How to Experience “True Love” in Your Marriage

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I believe you first have to start by defining love.  Since God is our creator, the topic of love is something He is very familiar with. In fact, the Bible says, “God is love”! (1 John 4:16) So here are a couple of bible truths to help guide our true love discussion:

1. True Love Takes Sacrifice

John 15:12-13 – “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, than he lay down his life for his friends.

Jesus made it very clear that true love is going to take sacrifice. He not only talked about it, but demonstrated it on the cross.  True love is going to take laying down your life in practical and emotional ways. This is why saying, “I love ice cream” should be very different than “I love my wife”. There is no sacrifice in eating ice cream, but it takes a tremendous amount of sacrifice to give up of yourself to love your spouse in a way that protects and provides for them. It requires a sacrifice of time, effort, money, personal happiness and comfort.

In other words, true love is an unconditional love that gives without getting back. This means that it will many times might feel unfair or unsatisfying. Let’s face it, the idea of “laying down your life” doesn’t sound or feel very good. Yet, this is the very foundation of a loving marriage and the more it is practiced, the more blessing will follow. 

2. True Love Doesn’t Give Up

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 – Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Once again, if biblical love is sacrificial, it also implies a lasting love. In other words, if you think about superficial love, it’s always usually rooted in what you get rather than what you give. I love ice cream because of what I get! When it stops satisfying my sweet tooth, I stop loving it. But if you think of true love in terms of giving rather than getting, it isn’t temperamental or short lived.

Of course, everyone wants to feel loved and receive love, but if this is the only condition, it won’t last. This is why we see couples making lifetime commitments on their wedding day and then getting a divorce a few years later. They have misunderstood the concept of an enduring love (“for better or for worse”), to mean as long as I feel loved.  The more married couples accept their love for one another will be tested and the need to stick with it, the more they will experience the true love that God intended. 

But this is just a tip of the iceberg when it comes to developing true love in your marriage. The PCC Mastering Marriage Conference will provide even more insight and practical tips to help you marriage be the best it can be! … Click here to register

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